An honor to be a Mother
Updated: Jul 24, 2020
For months I’ve been struggling to create a post that was meaningful and heart-centered. I started this blog to not only have a space for my thoughts but also to document my spiritual journey and to share this with all. In between all these lines is a message that will resonate with someone. It will help support you, move you to your core or who knows, inspire you to discover your greatness. At least, that is the intention that I put forth.
How poignant that today many are celebrating Mothers’ Day. I’ve been a mother for 22 years myself, I have my own mother, yet never has this day had any true meaning for me like today. I’ve been overwhelmed with emotion from the moment that I called my own mother to wish her a great day. A few years back that was not the case. Not only was I estranged from my mother for many years but I myself was not comfortable with being a mother. I’ve written and spoken of how the Munay-Ki rites were instrumental for me in my path to be healed and to heal others. The Munay-Ki are ancient and sacred rituals from the Qéro people of the high Andes passed on energetically that heal the wounds of the past, whether karmic or genetic. These rites help to transform and upgrade our luminous energy field. I found forgiveness for my mother and for myself. It hasn’t been easy but there is a sense of freedom that I can’t yet describe or put into words. I am doing my own work and in doing so I have gained such a profound understanding of the responsibility and the magnitude of difficulty that it is to truly be a mother, a parent.
I’d like to share some realizations and some things I ‘ve learned that have led to me to feel what an honor it is to be a mother. I was a mother way too young. I chose to have a child because I wanted to fulfill an unmet need in my heart. I was to give my child all the unconditional love that I felt was lacking in my own life. Then came along child number two less than a year later. Everything became overwhelming and unmanageable . Needless to say, I made some very difficult choices that I thought at the time helped to preserve my children’s welfare and my own. Fast forward to today, because this is about forgiveness and letting go. I will say for the time being that I hoped better for my girls but I couldn’t be there to give them what they needed. I can’t change the past but in making better choices today and being the best that I can be, I become someone that my children can look up to. Now with 3 children, ages 16-22, I can finally be okay with saying I am a worthy as a mother. I am grateful for the responsibility and the gift of giving life to 3 beings. They inspire me daily!! In understanding my own role, I have come to view my own mother with new eyes and a renewed heart. I value her and cherish her as she is. I honor her and rather than judge her I have compassion and empathy for all her unfulfilled dreams and needs while she did all that she could for my brother and I.